Cathy, my wife, owns and operates Iowa Park Jiu Jitsu Club with me. She’s an extremely capable purple belt and serves as a phenomenal BJJ mentor for the women who are part of our school. Over the course of almost two decades being involved with self defense or fight training with me and our kids, she’s had to train mostly with men.
The popularity of BJJ has made it so that any decent school with good coaching will have at least a handful of women training. It’s probably the best time in the history of the practice of training BJJ to get started. Cathy wrote this post on our business Facebook page not too long ago in response to the most common objection women have to getting started with BJJ or serious self defense training.
Most common thing we hear from women:
“I don’t like people in my personal bubble or being held down.“
Same girl, same. In over two decades of being around different martial arts and BJJ, I’ve never heard someone say they started because they like being held against their will.
Having your personal space invaded on and feeling powerless sucks. But here’s the thing, I would rather learn how to manage my space in practice than anywhere else. Somewhere that I control when things stop and practice pushing my limits overtime until I build skills, patiences, and confidence. Somewhere I’m surrounded by people all learning together and supporting each other.
Somewhere safe, where I can ask questions and make mistakes and learn from them. I don’t want anyone that’s uninvited in my bubble but I have a much better chance of removing them now than if I never started practicing.
Here’s the other cool thing… you learn a lot about yourself. You learn how much you can actually handle, how strong and capable you are and can become, and ways to deal with the things that you don’t want to tolerate. It’s not easy but nothing important ever is.
So, I’m calling out all the folks who are interested in BJJ, but feel cringy as hell when people are all up in their business. I get it and I promise not to minimize that. But, there’s nothing more beautiful than watching someone overcome and take control. So, choose to get out of your comfort zone, risk being uncomfortable, and try something new. There’s literally no downside. It’s all on you but we’re here to help you every step of the way.
Cathy Delgadillo, Owner
Iowa Park Jiu Jitsu Club
Lift. Fight. Win. 